The Luxury Woman's Bio

I'm an aging Generation X'r coming to grips with mortality. In the old days, nobody could "out party" me. Now, it's "lights out" by 9 pm.

I enjoy movies, music, and reading books. But my favorite hobby is being the devoted wife of the Major League's beloved "Mr. 50's". As you can see from my photo, I haven't been spending a lot of time at the gym lately. But that's ok. Mr. 50's says most folks drive a compact car, and he prefers a luxury model. Therefore, I am The Luxury Woman.

I figure I can't miss in the Ghoul Pool. I've always had a knack for spotting a celeb who's outta time, and I also happen to sleep with the 1998 Ghoul Pool Champion. Now, you gotta excuse me. Mr. 50's will be home in a few minutes, and I've got to go get his pipe and slippers.

THE LUXURY WOMAN LIST

*** Average age of Hits: 97.00 ***

Bob Barker (Gameshow Host)

Willard Scott (Weatherman)

Doris Day (Actress)

Clive James (Author)

Loretta Lynn (Singer)

Vera Lynn (Actress)

Bill Cosby (Scumbag Comedian)

Nichelle Nichols (Star Trek Actress)

I. M. Pei (Architect)

Barry Manilow (Singer)

Carol Channing (Comedian) (01/15)

Tommy Chong (Comedian)

Abby Lee Miller (Dance Moms)

Richard Simmons (Health Guru)

Tom Brokaw (Newscaster)

Little Richard (Musician)

Sidney Poitier (Actor)

Pete Davidson (Comedian)

Ric Flair (Wrassler)

Val Kilmer (Actor)